A Present From The Turds

Two weeks ago, I stayed home from work for the entire week (doctor's orders). On the Friday before that week (January 23rd), as I was driving to the elementary school, I was feeling pretty beat. As the day went on, I started feeling really cold and just crappy in general. Directly after work, I had a kanji test to take at my junior high school, so I drove my butt over there and took that, which drained me even more. After that, I picked up Yuko from work and we drove 1.5 hours through the mountains to her home in Sakurai. I was pretty beat. The next day, we helped a family friend with cleaning and other stuff related with her moving out of their house. Great stuff to do all day when you feel like crap. I did however, talk to her about sumo tickets, and she hooked me up. I'll be going to sumo in March and I'll be sitting on the floor. Can't wait to see thousands of pounds of pure sweaty flesh in nothing but big g-string things. AWESOME.

Anyway... after that, we went to eat sushi. I couldn't even turn my head at all to look at the sushi on the conveyor belt. If I did, my eyes would start to KILL. I went to bed early, and woke up in the middle of the night sweating. We took my temperature, and it was at about 104. I went to the doctor the next day, and it sucked having to get up and walk around to get there. They had free masks at the receptionist window, so me and Yuko both got one. There was some kid behind us, making noise and bumping into the back of our seats. I was sooo ready to scare the crap out of him and tell off his dad because his dad was doing nothing. Actually, he was tickling him and encouraging him to bounce around. If I could have turned my head and eyes even somewhat without pain, from then on, anytime they would even see a foreigner, they would drop everything in their pants. Lucky for them, I couldn't.

My turn finally came, so we were sitting outside of the room. We heard the nurse and doctor say, "Oh no... What should we do??" I was the first foreigner they had ever had there, and they didn't speak English, so they were pretty nervous and worried about what to do. I wonder how they thought I got the medical papers filled out that they gave me...? When Yuko walked in with me though, they were relieved. He stuck a long Q-tip up my nose and twirled it 20 times, and then tested it. It came back positive that I had the flu, and he said that I got a nice present from my students. Those pricks.

We went back home and I went to sleep. I woke up to watch the last 30 minutes of sumo though. It was the last day of it, and it was to decide who won the tournament. My guy (Asashoryu) won after having a playoff between (and winning) the other grand champion (Hakuho). Fricking awesome. I went back to sleep and woke up to eat some dinner and to watch the Japanese historical drama that is on every Sunday. Then, feeling like complete hell, I drove 1.5 hours back home through the mountains in the dark.

The next day, I stayed in bed all day. Yuko came back from work at about lunchtime. I got up and sat at the table to try to eat something. I got really light headed and fell down to my hands and knees, because I was starting to black out. I didn't faint, but I felt soooo completely out of it for a minute. I've never done drugs, but I can only assume that it feels something like that. I could hear what Yuko was saying, but had to work so hard to answer. After this passed, I got up to the table again, but it happened again, so I got down and just laid down on the futon for a few minutes. Then Yuko spoon fed me while I was laying down. I finally was able to sit up against the wall (still on the floor) and she spoon fed me some more. I could barely open my mouth. It was pretty rockin'. The doctor said to not take a shower that whole week because it weakens your body. So what happens? I get a damp washcloth bath from Yuko, all over my body. Awesome stuff, I tell ya, awesome stuff. I had that privilege for the next few days. I wonder who enjoyed it more, me or her.

I was pretty out the next day and most of the day after that. Thursday was the first day that I actually put the futon away during the day. I wore a mask the entire week too, trying to not give Yuko the same thing. She didn't get the flu, so I guess she was either lucky or it worked. During the week, I would sweat many times while sleeping, day and night. I have never changed clothes so much before in my life (they would be drenched every time I woke up, and I was in bed all day, so I went to sleep and woke up many times per day). We even had to blow dry the sheet I was sleeping on sometimes because it got so wet.

Anyway, that's pretty much my flu experience. Over the week before that, and the week I was home, more than half the school was gone every day, due to the flu. I was in the middle of one class, and they just sent them home because of it. I didn't have to use my days off, because I got sick days though. Woohoo!! The Japanese teachers can't do that though, they have to use their regular days off. Oh, the privileges of the gaijin...